Abundance. Acceptance. Gratitude. We often talk about these qualities as something to cultivate, but the truth is, they are natural states of being. We don’t have to work hard to access them. It’s more like we need to remember them.
Befriending Baby New Year
If the past year is an old man, and the new year is a baby, how do you relate to babies? As a new year begins, is it possible to approach our lives and relationships like they are a baby? That stuff you went through in the past year that makes you feel like you really need to get your act together? That's your teacher, your friend, a gift.
Resisting a Rest
There is a difference between consciously resting and collapsing in an exhausted heap after working hard. It’s also not the same as taking a break to check your email or watch TV. Resting in awareness is restorative and rebalances everything. Really resting involves your participation.
One tried-and-true way to do this is Constructive Rest (CR).
Love You
One thing I keep learning, over and over again, is to put myself first. Does that sound selfish and uncaring? It might, because we have been taught that in order to be really good, really loving, we must sacrifice ourselves.
You know this is false. You know that self-care is the cornerstone to a high-functioning life, where you are empowered and free to love and care for others. You know that you cannot pour from an empty cup and that putting on your own oxygen mask first is a wise instruction.
How to Be More Like Charlie Chaplin
I waved away notions of self-love as indulgent navel-gazing, an attempt to escape from the "realities" of the world and its troubles. Then I had an experience on retreat that changed all that. I began to realize how harsh I was with myself, and once recognized, this insight led to a huge transformation.
Turns out that Charlie Chaplin had a similar experience, and his On Loving Myself can be a roadmap to move from self-loathing to self- love.
Practicing the Pause
One of the key components of mindfulness and somatic processes like the Alexander Technique is practicing the Pause, learning how to wait before taking action. There is a moment between stimulus and response, and in that gap is the possibility of making a fresh, perhaps different choice. When we don't do that, we often increase our own suffering.
Includes a Bodymind Experiment
Visitors with a Tale to Tell
Lately I have been struggling with powerful bouts of despair and doubt, temporary but painful. While that makes me human, it doesn't need to dictate my day-to-day existence. The key is to recognize despair, negativity, fear, rage, and all these sticky heart-mind states for what they really are: visitors with a tale to tell.
Befriending Discomfort
Why should we engage in practices we dislike or find uncomfortable? Why does it matter whether certain habits are indulged in or not? And why does change take so long? How come things improve but don't stay that way? Why so much beginning again and again? As Carrie Fisher famously said, “Instant gratification takes too long.”